


A Love Worth Sharing

by occultclysms



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Australia, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Coming of Age, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Gen, M/M, Pining, Slow Burn, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:22:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24910789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/occultclysms/pseuds/occultclysms
Summary: “Why Korea?” Hyunjin asks. “You could move to America or New Zealand, but you chose there. Why?” Felix owes Hyunjin the truth, but he doesn’t know if he can tell him. It’s hard to admit to moving across the ocean for the love of your life, but it’s another thing to do that for someone who might not even be queer.“Because Chan is in Korea.” Felix looks away, but keeps holding onto Hyunjin’s hands which he’s sure he’s making very sweaty with how nervous he is.“Your best friend?” Hyunjin clarifies and Felix almost wishes Hyunjin didn’t know who Chan was, then maybe he could make something up and not finally expose the burden he wears every day.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Felix, Lee Felix & Lee Minho | Lee Know
Comments: 8
Kudos: 130
Collections: STRAY KIDS BIGBANG: 2020





	A Love Worth Sharing

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much to the mods first off for running a great fest and for granting me so many extensions 🥵 I'm actually decently proud of this fic and where it goes, so i hope r, the person who unintentionally made me really want to write this likes it 
> 
> note: italicized words are in korean

Felix doesn’t remember much of being three. Most people don’t. But the memory that sticks out the strongest is the memory of meeting Chan for the first time. Felix doesn’t remember the context but he had been out playing at the neighborhood park, the hot sun of summer burning down on his face. Instead of getting sunscreen or whining for his mom to put some on him Felix had kept playing in the sandbox with his shovel.

Now his mom has this great picture of Felix, all pink from the sun with the end of a yellow plastic shovel in his mouth. Felix used to find it a bit embarrassing but when Felix’s mom had dug out her old photo book when him and Chan were 13 and 15 respectively, Chan said that Felix looked like the cutest toddler ever. Then he squeezed 13 year old Felix’s cheeks and maybe Felix’s heart melted a bit.

Back to age 3. Playing in the sandbox by yourself is only so fun and Chan must have known this at the wise old age of 5, as he had climbed into the sand box with Felix and offered to let Felix play with his new truck. It didn’t matter that Felix was younger than him then and it shouldn’t matter now either.

They played together until Felix’s mom came over and realized how pink her son had turned. Maybe she had gotten a bit distracted, talking to other parents about schools. Felix would be starting kindergarten in a few months and she wanted all the tips she could get.

She picked up Felix in both her arms, coddling him and cooing at him. According to Felix’s mom, Chan had said that she had a really nice son and he wants to be friends. Felix’s mom fell in love with Chan right then and maybe Felix did too. Not literally but that moment is always something special.

* * *

Flash forward two years. It's the summer between 2nd and 3rd grade and Felix and Chan are running around the woods together. This is a terrible idea because Felix has a habit to not look where he is going, but Felix thinks he’s fine and has nothing to worry about.

“There’s not even that many roots,” Felix had whined. Chan was pouting because he didn’t think it was a good idea to race to the big clearing and back with it being late afternoon, but Felix would not be swayed. Felix was convinced that he was finally big enough to beat Chan in a race and would not leave the woods until he proved it.

“Alright. One race can’t hurt.” Chan wanted to race too which made it so easy for him to say yes. Felix also had smiled really big and made puppy eyes at Chan, which also made it harder to say no. “Ready, set, go!”

The two had torn their way through the woods, running as fast as their little legs would carry them. Felix touched the big tree first and was about to make his way back, but he tripped on a large root he had missed on his way there. Falling face first into the dirt, Felix held back tears.

“Felix!” Chan cried. “Are you okay?” Chan dropped to his knees to help Felix into a sitting position and gave him a quick once over. “In Boy Scouts if you get hurt we gotta get an adult and a first aid kit.” Chan shook the dirt and twigs out of Felix’s hair and brushed any smudges off his cheeks. “All better!”

“Channie,” Felix’s voice wobbled. “My knee hurts.” Chan looks over at Felix’s knee and sure enough there was a big cut that had a small trickle of blood coming out of it.

“Oh no. I think we gotta get your mommy,” Chan said.

“I don’t think I can walk ever again, Channie!” Felix whined. His knee hurt and he didn’t get to prove himself to Chan. Felix was close to crying and didn’t know how to hold his tears in like a big boy. Tears start falling and Felix rubs at them frantically to try and make them stop.

“Felix,” Chan frowned. “I don’t want you to hurt.” Chan looked so sad and Felix only felt like crying more. Chan was such a good friend to him. What did he do to deserve him? “Maybe I have a bandaid in my pocket.” Searching through his pockets, Chan pulls out a bandaid. “This will make you feel better.”

Chan opens the band-aid, careful not to touch the white pad part with his bare fingers. Placing it over Felix’s knee with excessive care, Chan checks and makes sure Felix isn’t hurting.

“Thank you,” Felix sniffles.

“It's what friends are for,” Chan replied, smiling once again. “And only because you’re my best friend will I let you in on a super secret for healing boo-boos. If you put a bandaid on, then kiss the band aid you’ll speed up the healing.”

“How does that work?” Felix had never heard anything like that and if Felix’s mom hadn’t told him it must be very new as Felix’s mom knows everything. She said so.

“Like this.” Chan bends down and presses a wet kiss right to Felix’s knee. “My mommy said that this makes all boo-boos heal. And my mommy is very smart so I trust her.”

“Me too. Your mom is nice. She also bakes really nice cookies.” Felix and Chan got distracted talking about cookies until Felix decided his knee no longer hurt and they could walk back to Felix’s house so his mom could see his cut.

* * *

At the age of 13, Felix thinks he knows everything. He’s actually a big kid now and can do everything. His mom disagreed but didn’t stop Felix from attempting to follow all of the dreams he could come up with. Felix’s Boy Scout Troop had a camping trip one weekend during April, and since Chan was in Boy Scouts too, Felix really wanted to go.

His mom wasn’t too sure about letting Felix spend the night somewhere other than Chan’s house for a whole weekend. But Felix (and Chan) had convinced her that Felix would be fine.

Come the first night of the trip and Felix was starting to think that his mom was right. Felix wasn’t ready to sleep away from home or away from Chan, but he couldn’t go back now. Checking the digital watch Chan had given him for his 13th birthday, Felix noticed that it was already 11:30 pm.

It isn’t his fault he can’t sleep. Felix just can’t get comfortable, or feel tired, or feel safe. Who knew tents were so paper thin that you could see out if you really tried. That definitely didn’t make Felix feel any safer. Plus, some of the older kids had been telling stories about how wolves liked to walk around the campsite. Wolves and Felix did not mix. Neither did Felix and bears. Or mountain lions if we’re getting things out there.

So now Felix had to make a choice. Does he suffer here until the sun rises? Or does he go to Chan’s tent and wake him up? Waking up Chan would make Felix feel so guilty, Chan deserves sleep just as much as he does. But laying here in the dark won’t help anything. Felix’s tent mates are passed out soundly and Felix envies them. Curse people who like camping, this sucks.

Felix slips on his shoes as quietly as he can, hoping that he won’t wake anyone up. No one stirs which is good. After he stepped out into the dark, Felix felt so uncomfortable. Chan’s tent is literally 15 feet away; he can do it. Felix takes two small steps, hears something to his right and practically runs to Chan’s tent.

Felix unzips the top of the tent and cringes at the sound. It’s the only thing that can be heard and Felix is convinced everyone will hear it and wake up. Poking his head in, Felix locates Chan’s bed. At least he’s right next to the door. While terrible in the case of an invasion, this invasion would at least be for the greater good.

Felix gets himself into the tent and next to Chan. “Channie,” he whispers. Chan, much to his good nature, stirs immediately.

“Felix?” Chan questions, voice quiet and raspy. Setting aside how that voice makes Felix’s insides feel, Felix bites his cheek.

“I can’t sleep,” is all it takes before Chan is sitting up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“How can I help, Lixie?” Lixie is a new nickname Chan had made up for Felix. Ever since he started going by Chris in school Felix had felt weird calling Chan his ‘nickname.’ Even though Chan predates Chris by over ten years, but who’s counting. So Chan had decided that they both get cute nicknames. And now everytime Felix is called  _ Lixie _ his stomach does a flip and he doesn’t quite know why nor does he want to think about it too much.

“Can we go outside so we don’t wake anyone?” Felix asks, feeling super shy all of a sudden. Since Felix can’t quite meet Chan’s eyes, Chan leads him by the wrist out of the tent and over to the picnic tables.

“What’s going on, Lixie?” Chan asks, lightly rubbing the inside of Felix’s wrist. Felix hops on the table and lays back so he can stare at the stars instead of Chan’s deep and lovely eyes.

“I can’t sleep alone. And I know I’m 13 now, and I should be fine. But I’ve been laying there for over an hour and it wasn’t getting any better,” Felix explains. “So, I went and got you because I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Aww, Felix,” Chan coos. “I can’t believe you came to me over an adult. I may be 15 now, but I don’t know anything yet. All I know is that we are best friends and nothing will change that. Now move over so I can lay next to you.” Felix scootches over and Chan lays down next to him, hands still intertwined. Chan gives Felix’s hand a quick squeeze. “I wish I knew astronomy because these stars are super pretty but they are pretty whether or not I know anything about them.”

“I don’t know anything about astronomy either, so I guess neither of us know anything,” Felix nearly giggles. Chan always knows exactly what to say to make him feel better. Chan laughs too and it makes something warm settle in Felix’s chest. Everything feels right with the world.

A shooting star goes sprinting across the sky and Chan points at it with the hand not holding Felix’s and Felix smiles.

“Y’know what that means right?” Chan asks.

“What what means?”

“A shooting star, Lix,” Chan says.

“Nope,” Felix replies, popping the P.

“It means I’m going to make a wish and the wish will come true,” Chan smiles. “You should make a wish too. There’s no limit on how many people can make a wish on the same shooting star, right?”

“I don’t think so,” Felix replies, cheeks feeling a tad hot even though the night was cool. Felix couldn’t help the way that Chan would make his heart race every time he said something sappy like that. Well, it didn’t have to be that sappy. Maybe it could just be anything that Chan says.

Felix knows what he’s wishing for. For Chan to be his soulmate. There’s no one else that he has ever liked this much or wanted to spend so much time with. Felix hasn’t heard of two boys being soulmates, but there’s a first time for everything.

“Okay, I made my wish,” Felix says.

“Tell me what it was— wait no don’t then it won’t come true.”

“I thought that was only true with Santa Claus.” Felix sits up and looks at Chan funnily who only laughs at Felix’s distress. “No, seriously.”

“Felix, what? Who’s been telling you lies?”

“My mom! She said that if you told anyone what you wanted from Santa he wouldn’t bring it to you,” Felix must not realize how loud he’s talking, so Chan presses a finger to Felix’s lips. And maybe Felix’s brain short circuits. He’s silent and Chan retracts his finger, looking a bit shy.

“Let’s try to get you to fall asleep, okay?” Felix gets off the picnic table and leads Chan by the wrist back to his tent.

“You lay down and I’ll go get my sleeping bag, so you won’t be alone, okay?” Chan asks and Felix nods. Chan truly is the sweetest boy ever and is going to melt Felix’s heart.

Felix gets all cozy in his tent and waits patiently for Chan to come back. After a few minutes, Felix thinks Chan has left him and is about to try sleeping on his own again, but then the zipper on Felix’s tent comes down. And perhaps Felix’s heart flutters.

“Felix, mate?” Chan whispers, as there is another kid in the tent with them.

“Right here, Channie,” Felix whispers back. Chan finds Felix and wiggles his sleeping bag in next to Felix. Chan gets himself comfortable before giving Felix back his attention.

“Do you feel better now?” Chan asks, voice still soft.

“Yeah, a bit.” To be honest, Felix could already drift off just from Chan’s presence.

“Take your arm out of your sleeping bag,” Chan says and Felix does what Chan asks without really thinking about what was asked of him. Then Chan interlocks their fingers and Felix is suddenly much more awake. “So you’re sure that I won’t go anywhere.” Felix doesn’t reply, much too scared of somehow word vomiting a confession on the spot because Chan is the most caring, compassionate and caring person Felix has ever met.

“Goodnight, Chan,” Felix whispers, giving Chan’s hand a little squeeze, which Chan returns.

"Goodnight, Felix," Chan says back, lightly rubbing his fingers over Felix's knuckles. That's the last thing Felix remembers before falling asleep.

* * *

Chan is off to college. There’s no one left to pick up Felix’s pieces. Felix was there on the day that Chan packed up his things, packing away all of the memories that the two of them had built together into brown boxes to go to Korea with him.

Felix didn't cry that day, but he came really close to it. Even if there was still a whole ass week before Chan officially left, Felix was already feeling his absence.

"Felix? Lixie? Are you still here?" Chan waves a hand in front of Felix's eyes and Felix snaps back to the present. Chan offered to take Felix out to the movies (something that definitely isn't a date) before Chan's parents would pick him up and take Chan to the airport. Then they would take Felix home and Felix would be forced to keep it together for the twenty-five minutes he would be stuck in the car with them.

Felix swallows down his tears and nods, but Chan doesn't really seem to believe Felix. Faking a smile, Felix pulls Chan into the theater.

"Since this is our last time out together I think you should pay for all my snacks," Felix teases, trying to keep this afternoon from getting sad. If he spends some of his last time with Chan being fucking miserable, he'll never forgive himself.

"That is completely valid, and I will use that same logic to buy way too much junk food that will make my abs completely disappear," Chan replies, seeming to either believe Felix or catch his drift to make this fun.

"What abs?" Felix counters. Chan is super into weights and being healthy which Felix couldn't care less about, so he sees no issue in teasing Chan until the end of time.

"I would show you  _ right now _ but we are in public and I have some dignity left."

"That seems like you finding an excuse to cover up the fact that you have actually accomplished nothing while doing all of your workouts," Felix hypothesizes and Chan grabs his wrist and drags him off to the nearest bathroom, which must look extremely strange to the girl working behind the counter. Chan shuts the door behind them and Felix tries to prep his mind to see Chan's probably very real abs. It isn't really the type of thing Chan would lie about and Felix is mainly trying to push his buttons, but he didn't think Chan would insist on proving that he's right.

Chan glances around quickly and lifts his shirt to reveal a whole six pack of abs. Felix is genuinely impressed because objectively those are amazing abs. Now, the gay side of Felix is screaming and on fire, but that's okay because that's not unusual with Chan.

"Nice, bro," Felix says, trying to kill any of the tension that seems to be choking only him. There seems to be some at least between them, but only Felix is really affected by it which doesn't even make sense. "But can we go buy our junk food now because I didn't eat anything before this, and I would like to sit down in time to actually see the movie."

"You're ridiculous," Chan mutters and they walk right back out of the men's room like nothing happened.

* * *

“I really need to stop catching you two making out,” Felix sighs as he drops his bookbag on the floor of Hyunjin’s room. Jisung is in Hyunjin’s lap and as of ten seconds ago they were kissing like they were about to fucking die. Now that Chan is gone, Felix has to put up with the grossest couple shit from them, and normally it’s pretty fine. But today, Felix got a text from Chan that he won’t be able to make their weekly FaceTime. That throws a wrench— no, a whole ass sink into Felix’s good mood.

“I think you should join our makeout sessions so you aren’t so grumpy all the time,” Jisung suggests. Hyunjin laughs along with Jisung.

“See, you say that but if I took you up on it you wouldn’t like it very much,” Felix points out.

“Hyunjin has always thought you’re pretty anyway, so I don’t see why not,” Jisung says.

“You’re literally my soulmate, you’re not supposed to be encouraging me to kiss other boys.” Hyunjin swats at Jisung and Jisung ducks, which knocks him out of Hyunjin’s lap and onto the floor.

"I'm your soulmate which is why I'm fine with you kissing other boys," Jisung counters. "I know you'd never leave me for Felix—" Jisung turns his head to Felix. "No offense Felix I love you and you're one of my closest friends on the planet—" Felix holds up a hand.

"You two are disgustingly in love, I'm not even going to bother to try to get in on that. Partially because it's disgusting from an outside perspective, and also because I'm a decent person, even when I don't want to act like one," Felix says, sitting down onto Hyunjin's plush carpet. "Do you two at least have anything fun to tell me about?"

"No, nothing happened," Hyunjin says right as Jisung says,

"Hyunjin is pregnant." Both Hyunjin and Felix look to Jisung with confused glances. "Okay, Hyunjin  _ isn't _ pregnant." Hyunjin rolls his eyes.

"There are probably a dozen reasons as to why I'm not pregnant and most of them involve my anatomy and the fact that I'm dating you," Hyunjin points out, still flat on the carpet.

"Well, Felix seems sad and I don't know how to cheer him up," Jisung whines.

"I am right here," Felix sing-songs and the attention is once again on him. He knows Hyunjin and Jisung really don't intend to get so sucked into themselves, and that it's just a part of being soulmates, but it really makes it strike home to Felix how he very much doesn't have that.

Yeah, so he's jealous of Hyunjin and Jisung. Who wouldn't be? For as much as they both drive Felix up the walls they are wonderful friends and really good for each other.

"Anyways," Hyunjin sighs. "I think I'm going to fail US History because I don't want to read my textbook for eight hours a week, and Jisung isn't exactly very helpful in this subject."

"Meanie," Jisung pouts. "No kisses for you then." Jisung crosses his arms and turns his body away from Hyunjin's on the bed.

"That won't last," Felix reassures. "But one tip I have for reading so much a week is just do a little all of the time; ten minutes before school, ten after tutoring, etcetera.” 

"Thanks, Felix," Hyunjin replies while Jisung whines from the bed. "Alright, Sungie, I'll come down there and cuddle you." Hyunjin climbs off his bed and Jisung makes a happy noise. Man, those two are gross, but also goals at the same times. Truly a hard line to walk, but they do it beautifully.

“Anything up with you, Felix?” Hyunjin asks.

“I’m just missing someone,” Felix replies, guarded. It isn’t that he doesn’t trust Hyunjin and Jisung, but sixteen year olds don’t exactly have good track records of being serious and mature.

“Awww, that sucks,” Jisung says. “Is there anything me and Hyunjin’s wallet can do?” Hyunjin hits Jisung’s arm, but chooses not to lecture Jisung right now.

“Hyunjin’s wallet might actually be what I need right now,” Felix hypothesizes. “Snow cones from down the road always cure sadness.”

“So does not having to pay for your own snow cone,” Jisung agrees, high-fiving Felix. Felix laughs and Hyunjin whines, collapsing onto the floor.

“You’re lucky I love you both,” Hyunjin mumbles which causes Jisung and Felix to cheer.

“Okay, let’s go get snow cones,” Jisung says, jumping off the bed and nearly sprinting out of Hyunjin’s room. Felix rolls his eyes and gets up, Hyunjin following close behind.

“Y’know if you need to talk about anything, I’m here, not just my wallet,” Hyunjin reassures.

“Thank you,” Felix replies. “I feel like I’m being a bit over dramatic about it, so I really don’t want to bother you or Jisung about it.” The two of them reach the bottom of the stairs and slip their shoes on.

“Doesn’t mean someone still shouldn’t listen to you,” Hyunjin points out.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Felix says, opening the front door to reveal Jisung.

“You guys are slowpokes,” Jisung whines and Felix laughs. Jisung is always so positive, it helps Felix feel better about whatever is troubling him. “The snow cone place is literally only two blocked away, but with the speed that you two are walking, it’ll feel like two miles.”

“You are so dramatic,” Hyunjin says, racing ahead of Felix to jump on Jisung, who screams, but grabs Hyunjin so he can latch onto Jisung.

“You two are still disgusting,” Felix comments.

“I’m buying you a snow cone, so you can shush for like five minutes,” Hyunjin replies, sticking his tongue out at Felix.

The three of them walk the two blocks, chattering about anything until they reach the snow cone shop. Hyunjin removes himself from Jisung and they walk into the store.

“Hello, what can I get you today?” the person behind the counter asks.

“Whatever, these two gobblins want,” Hyunjin says, sighing, pulling out his wallet. Jisung shoots off his order and Felix gawks at being called a goblin. Many nicknames may be appropriate for Felix, but goblin is not one of them.

“Can I have a mango pineapple snow cone please?” Felix orders. The employee nods, scooping some ice up for him.

“I hope this makes you feel better, because my wallet does not,” Hyunjing mumbles.

“How much cash do you have?” Felix whispers back.

“Like twenty bucks total, but half of it is in coins,” Hyunjin replies.

“That poor poor employee.”

“It’s not my fault Jisung volunteered me,” Hyunjin defends.

“I heard my name,” Jisung chimes in, holding two snow cones. He hands one to Felix who takes a small bite while Jisung nearly inhales all of his in one bite. Hyunjin goes to order and Jisung puts an arm around Felix’s shoulders. “I really hope whatever it is that’s weighing on you gets resolved shortly because you’re me and Hyunjin’s best friend in the whole world and hate to see you even a tiny bit sad. All we ever want is for you to be happy.” Felix’s chest tightens and he makes his best smile at Jisung.

“And you two do a great job of that. Thank you for being the best friends a guy could ask for.”

* * *

It's the fall of Felix's senior year and he's out getting coffee with Hyunjin (Jisung and Hyunjin finally grew out of being so attached at the hip) when he decides to break the news to him. He still hadn't told Jisung, or his parents, or even Chan, but Felix needs to tell someone or he's just about gonna lose it.

Felix orders for the both of them, sets their drinks on the table of the small cafe in downtown Sydney and removes his outer jacket and gloves.

"So, why am I here?" Hyunjin asks. "You only ever offer to take me out when you need to talk. You're not dying, right?"

"No, I'm not dying," Felix huffs. "And there's plenty of times when I've taken you out and there wasn't some special occasion." Felix takes a sip of his coffee and winces, he really needs to be more patient or he'll burn his goddamn tongue off.

"Name one time," Hyunjin counters, sipping his iced coffee casually almost to make a point to Felix. Hyunjin will drink iced coffee anytime of the year, even if it's December and it's snowing he’ll still have his iced coffee.

"Last month I took you out." Felix presses his fingers into the cup, hoping it will magically tell him when he can drink his stupid drink.

"That was for us both passing our Physics exam that we both thought we were going to fail."

"Isn't that close enough?" Felix whines.

"No, now tell me what's going on with you?" Hyunjin asks. Felix really had never been good at hiding anything from Hyunjin and this just proves it.

"So, you know how colleges want our applications like soon-ish, right?" Felix asks, hoping to break the news lightly. Hyunjin and Jisung had really wanted Felix to go to the same college as them here in Sydney, but Felix doesn't want to stay in Australia for his whole life. He has his whole life ahead of him and he wants to get a head start. Chan might also be a big chunk of his reason, but Hyunjin doesn't need to know that.

"Yeah, have you not finished yours yet?" Hyunjin asks. "Because I can help you if you want."

"No, I already submitted mine." Felix sighs. This is way harder than he thought it would be. He thought he could just tell Hyunjin and move on. "It's about where I submitted them." Hyunjin's face drops.

"Are you not coming with me and Jisung?" Hyunjin sounds hurt and Felix wants to cry, he already feels so bad, but this is where he needs to put on his big boy pants and make a decision.

"My first choice school is the University of Seoul in Korea," Felix says. "If I don't get in, I'm staying here for sure with you and Sungie." Hyunjin looks a little more relieved but still has worry etched into his features. Felix reaches out across the table and grabs Hyunjin's hands.

"I love you and Jisung to death, don't get me wrong, but I need to leave Australia," Felix admits. "I have been here my whole life and I want to see places before I settle in and get some lame job."

"Why Korea?" Hyunjin asks. "You could move to America or New Zealand, but you chose there. Why?" Felix owes Hyunjin the truth, but he doesn't know if he can tell him. It's hard to admit to moving across the ocean for the love of your life, but it's another thing to do that for someone who might not even be queer.

"Because Chan is in Korea." Felix looks away, but keeps holding onto Hyunjin's hands which he's sure he's making very sweaty with how nervous he is.

"Your best friend?" Hyunjin clarifies and Felix almost wishes Hyunjin  _ didn't _ know who Chan was, then maybe he could make something up and not finally expose the burden he wears every day.

"Yeah," Felix mumbles.

"I think there's something more here, that you're not telling me," Hyunjin comments, leaning back in his chair and sipping his drink. "You seem like, overly shameful about this, which isn't really like you. What's so special about Chan?" Felix bites his lip. If Felix is going to tell anyone about his theory about Chan being his soulmate, it might as well be Hyunjin.

"I think— emphasis on think, that Chan might be my soulmate," Felix relents and Hyunjin squeals, causing Felix to lean forward and snap his hand over Hyunjin's mouth. "Shut it or I won't say anything else." Hyunjin nods eagerly and Felix removes his hand from Hyunjin's face, wiping it on his pants.

"Okay, yes I will be quiet." Hyunjin mimes zipping his lips and Felix remembers why Hyunjin is his friend.

"Basically, y'know the supposed soulmate feeling or whatever?" Felix asks. "Wait, yeah you know— literally Jisung." Hyunjin laughs and signals for Felix to continue. "Well, I get that feeling, I think, with Chan. Like when he left it felt like someone was stealing my leg and my heart which seems a bit extreme for only a friend."

"I mean, I don't really know. Besides Jisung, you're my closest friend and you just told me you're moving halfway around the world. I feel like I'm losing my arm, which as we know is less extreme because you don't rely so much on your arm as opposed to your leg. Like both are bad, don't get me wrong, but losing a leg seems worse," Hyunjin rambles.

"I get what you mean," Felix replies. "So you think that there's a chance?"

"Felix, no one can know your heart except for you and I think you should follow it. If Chan isn't your soulmate, then it's not the end of the world. You'll be in a new country where you can meet so many new people and it'll be an adventure on it's own," Hyunjin reassures.

"Thank you." Felix takes another sip of his drink. "I really hope I get into that school or else all of this drama will have been for nothing."

"I got entertainment out of it, so that's good enough for me." Felix swats at Hyunjin, who dodges easily and laughs.

"Thanks for being understanding at the very least." Felix sighs.

"For real, it's no problem at all, and I can break the news to Jisung if you want," Hyunjin offers.

"I think I should do it myself. Just help free him up a bit, I feel like either the two of you are together or he's off doing god knows what."

"I can do that." Hyunjin crosses his legs and rests his elbows on the table. "When do you want to tell him?"

"I feel like he won't take it as well, so maybe after I get my acceptance letter," Felix suggests. "If I don't get in, I don't want to worry him at all."

"It'll go fine, I promise."

* * *

Felix gets home one day, checks the mailbox and is surprised to see that there's something for him in the mail. It's from University of Seoul. Oh god. This is his acceptance or rejection letter. Felix grabs it and practically sprints into his room without even saying hello to his mom.

Chan found out about Felix applying to the University of Seoul a little after Hyunjin found out and then Chan made Felix promise to Skype him when Felix got his acceptance letter.

Felix boots up his computer and opens Skype, hands shaking as he types in Chan's username. Then it's ringing and ringing and Felix is positive Chan isn't going to answer, but then it's connecting and Felix sees Chan's face. His heart surges seeing that Chan is wearing the beanie he made for him several years ago.

"OMG Felix! Hi," Chan says excitedly. "I didn't think you were gonna call today." Felix notices how rough Chan's English has been getting. He doesn't get to speak it much in Korea and so he's losing it a bit.

"Hi there, Chan," Felix replies. "You told me to call whenever I got my letter and I found it in my mailbox like five minutes ago and now I'm here."

"Well, what are you waiting for? Open it," Chan cheers.

"Okay okay." Felix grabs the envelope next to him and rips the top open. "Oh man, I'm so nervous to open this. What if I don't get in?"

"Then I will continue to support you from afar," Chan replies. Felix gives a tight smile and pulls everything out of the envelope. He grabs the first thing on top and his jaw drops when he reads what's on the top.

"Holy fuck," Felix mutters. "I got in!" Felix flips his acceptance letter around and tries to show Chan clearly because sometimes Skype just isn't the same as being with someone in real life. Chan jumps up and cheers for Felix.

"I'm so proud of you, Lixie!" Chan screams and Felix reaches up to wipe his eyes because he's crying already somehow. He's really gonna be reunited with Chan again. There's a knock in the background and Felix moves his letter to see Chan isn't on screen anymore.

"Chan, where did you go?" Felix asks. Then Chan pops back in frame and so does someone Felix has never met before.

"Felix, I'm so sorry, but I forgot I promised Changbin here that I would go out with him tonight." Chan looks genuinely sorry, but Felix's heart still ties into a knot. He just wanted one night with Chan all to himself. Changbin says something in Korean to Chan which Felix doesn't catch and Chan quickly replies back with a laugh. Now, Felix feels like the odd one out on his own fucking Skype call.

"It's totally fine," Felix lies. "Go have fun with your friend. Besides, I need to call Hyunjin." Before Chan can say anything, Felix hangs up the call before he breaks into more tears on camera. Once his laptop is closed, Felix can't help the second wave of tears.

He's not jealous of Changbin getting to spend more time with Chan, he just wants some of his own time. It feels like Chan is always busy nowadays and Felix knows Chan's a big kid now or whatever, but he really can't spare a full half an hour for Felix?

Felix knows he should call Hyunjin and he has to plan out a meeting with Jisung, but he's not in the right headspace for that right now. He places his laptop on his desk and lays down for a nap. Just something to shut his brain up for a bit.

* * *

Felix got around to calling Hyunjin, who was overwhelmingly supportive. Then Felix texted Jisung if he wants to go and meet up at the beach for sunset. Much to Felix's relief, Jisung says he's free and will meet him there in thirty minutes.

"Hey, mom? I need to go meet up with Jisung before sunset, so I can take the car, right?" Felix asks when he walks downstairs, dressed in a jacket and hat.

"Yeah, just be home soon, Felix. You have school tomorrow," his mom replies.

"Thank you, you're the best." Felix grabs the keys off the kitchen counter and heads out the front door. He gets in his mom's car and sits for a moment before starting it up. Pulling out of the driveway isn't hard at this point, but Felix remembers when he first learned how to drive and Chan would take him to the beach at night when the parking lot was empty and let him practice even though he technically wasn't supposed to. The memory pulls at painful heart strings of Felix's, so he turns up the radio to try and drown out his thoughts.

Felix makes it to the beach with five minutes to spare before Jisung arrives and he turns his car off and rests his head on the steering wheel. He doesn't know how Jisung will take the news and if he takes it badly, Felix is gonna cry. The incident with Chan earlier really fucked with his ability to keep it together.

A knock at his window has Felix sitting up. Jisung is outside of his window and Felix opens his door and hops out.

"I didn't realize you were here yet," Felix says, shoving both of his hands in his pockets as they walk from the parking lot down the stairs and to the beach. Jisung plops down in the sand and Felix mimics him.

"So why are we here?" Jisung asks. "You wouldn't have brought me here unless you have to break some big news to me."

"Okay, maybe you're right—"

"I think I should try to guess it to relieve some of my anxiety," Jisung interrupts. "Okay, you didn't get anyone pregnant right?"

"Jisung, I'm gay."

"That's a valid point, but if someone stole some sperm they could make a baby," Jisung points out. He's being a bit over dramatic, but Felix gets it that it's his way to cope. "Did you kill anyone?"

"No, I didn't do anything illegal," Felix reassures. "What I did might hurt your feelings though."

"Is Hyunjin okay?" It's adorable how Jisung's first thought is Hyunjin. They really  _ are _ soulmates.

"Yeah, Hyunjin is the one I told first because I knew he would take it better," Felix reveals. "But it really isn't that bad."

"So just tell me then."

"I'm not going to college with you and Hyunjin. I got into the University of Seoul and I'm going there to chase Chan who I think is my soulmate. Technically, it had always been our plan to go college together because we are best friends, but once he moved away it felt like I had to follow him because he makes me so happy," Felix explains.

"Wow."

Felix knows it's a lot to take in at once and doesn't really know how Jisung is feeling right now so he takes a risk and grabs Jisung's hand. Jisung squeezes Felix's hand tightly and Felix squeezes right back.

"It's a lot of information really quickly I know, so take your time with it, Sungie." Jisung nods and rests his head on Felix's shoulder. The two of them watch as the sun slowly dips below the horizon.

"When do you leave?" Jisung asks, breaking their silence.

"I leave at the end of summer, like early August. My mom wants me to get settled in to my new dorm before school starts so I'm not so overwhelmed," Felix says. "It's only November now, so there's still lots of time to do all kinds of stupid things don't worry."

"Then cross off something on my list with me right now," Jisung decides. "I want to skinny dip in the ocean at least once."

"I don't know how you've never done this before," Felix says with a tight laugh. "Also isn't it illegal?"

"We're both eighteen, so it's not illegal," Jisung says.

"I think you have that wrong—" But Jisung already has his shirt off and is looking at Felix. "Well, no one is out here anyway and it's not that cold, so I guess we can." Felix throws off his beanie and jacket. "This is ridiculous and I'm only doing it because I love you."

"I love you too," Jisung says as he kicks his pants off into the sand. He's only in his underwear whereas Felix is still mostly dressed. Oh, the things he does for friendship. Felix stripes down to his underwear and shivers.

"Into the water we go," Felix declares, hoping the water will somehow be warmer than the air around him.

It's not. It's so cold Felix screams when his feet first touch the water and Jisung laughs, splashing Felix with water eliciting another scream from Felix. Felix tries to splash Jisung back, but he's too slow.

"You will never catch me!" Jisung shouts before jumping all the way into the water. For a second, Felix is scared something terrible has happened to Jisung, but then he feels a hand around his ankle.

"Jisung! How are you even functioning right now?" Felix gasps. "I'm freezing my ass off, but you can fucking swim in like thirty-degree water somehow."

"Yeah, I have no clue, but if you're dying we can go and dry off," Jisung suggests. "I walked here though, so I will be using your shirt."

"You can't be real," Felix mutters. "Come on, we can sit in my car with the heat on max and then get dressed."

"Sounds like a plan." Then Jisung is dashing ahead out of the water and Felix is struggling to keep up with him. Felix huffs and grabs his clothes from the ground, before chasing after Jisung. It's embarrassing to know that anyone could just come to the beach and see two random teenage boys in their underwear, so Felix pushes himself a bit faster until he's standing next to his car.

Jisung is waiting for Felix, dripping wet and smiling. Even if the water was cold as balls, Felix did have fun with Jisung. Felix unlocks his car and Jisung climbs in the back while Felix starts the car.

Once the heat is on full blast, Felix comes to sit next to Jisung in the back seat. They sit quietly for a moment, enjoying their time together.

"I can't believe you're going to leave and go to Korea," Jisung says, breaking their silence. "You don't even speak fluent Korean."

"I've been trying to learn, but it doesn't help that the only person who speaks it lives in Korea right now." Felix gives Jisung a not serious glare and Jisung throws his hands up.

"My parents were only proficient and since I wasn't super into learning it, they forgot."

"I know, same with my mom. She basically grew up here, so she rarely had to speak it." Felix sighs. "Sometimes I wish she made  _ me _ learn it though."

"Yeah, I totally get that," Jisung agrees. "I don't need to speak it, but you now have a real reason to need to learn it. I hope you can pick it up quickly."

"Me too, but I looked and the school offers some extra help to those that aren't fluent. My foreign language is officially English, but they are passing me through most of the required English classes and letting me replace them with Korean," Felix explains.

"Nice workaround of the system," Jisung replies. "I really will miss you a lot, Felix, but I want you to be happy first and foremost."

"Thank you, Jisung." Felix feels like he's going to cry so he gives Jisung a huge hug. And honestly, hugging in the backseat of Felix's car in their underwear is the best send off for the two of them.

* * *

Felix's send off is small, with only his mom, Hyunjin, and Jisung with him. It's perfect as is and Felix gets on his flight to Korea with no issues. Chan had promised to pick him up from the airport and Felix can finally turn his phone back on, so he can call him.

Standing in baggage claim, Felix waits for his suitcase. His phone is non-stop buzzing from the sheer amount of messages Jisung and Hyunjin sent him, wishing him the best. When the buzzing finally dies down, and there's still no suitcase in sight, Felix checks his messages for any from Chan.

Chan: hey look up

Huh. Look up, what is he talking about? Felix looks up and there is Chan, standing twenty feet away with Felix's suitcase, smiling and waving. There's nothing that could have stopped Felix from barreling into Chan and wrapping him in the biggest hug ever.

"Channie," Felix says. "I've missed you so much."

"I've missed you too, Lixie." Hearing that nickname after so long makes tears well up in Felix's eyes. Oh god, how he's missed Chan so much. Two years of nothing but video calls, and finally Felix is back to experiencing the real deal. Felix forces himself to remove himself from Chan's arms and he might be imagining it but Chan looks sad to let him go.

"Thank you for picking me up," Felix comments, suddenly awkward.

"We are  _ not _ going to get awkward with each other," Chan declares. "My car is outside, in danger of getting towed and we are going to go out and have fun tonight. We can stop off at my dorm to drop your stuff off as freshmen can't move in for another few days."

"What! You told me I could move in tomorrow," Felix whines. How is he supposed to live with Chan for several days and not lose his gay mind.

"It got pushed back and you're flight was already booked and I know you wouldn't have wanted to impose on me or something, and I'm not letting you rebook a flight just to save me some meaningless convenience." This is why Felix thinks Chan is his soulmate. He's always thinking of Felix's needs and it's truly heartwarming.

"Okay, where are we going after we hit your dorm?" Felix asks. He had tried to look up places to go in Seoul, but couldn't really find anything that seemed worth his time.

"It's a surprise, but it's also more than one place," Chan hints, and Felix whines. He'll never guess where they are going.

They exit the airport and Chan races ahead to make sure his car isn't towed. When Felix reaches the car, his suitcase is already in the back and Chan is ready to drive. Felix watches as they leave the airport and the buildings go by. Seoul is so much prettier than he expected. It's certainly different from Australia, but he can't help but look for similarities between the two.

"Felix, we're here," Chan says and Felix straightens up, he has no idea how he fell asleep on such a short drive, but he did. Wiping the drool from his mouth, Felix unbuckles his seatbelt and yawns. "Are you going to make it?"

"I will, but you're carrying my bag again. Hand over your keys." Chan pulls his keys out of his pocket and tosses them to Felix who goes up the front door of Chan's dorm building and opens the front door.

"Hold the door at least," Chan calls and Felix rolls his eyes. Of course, he'll hold the door for Chan. They both get through the front door and up the elevator with no issues. It's when Chan opens his dorm door that a problem arises.

_ "Yo, Chan, weren't we going to go out tonight?" _ Felix is first proud of himself for understanding that, even if there are a few bits that he used to put together the pieces of that sentence. Second, Felix realizes who that voice belongs to Changbin, Chan's roommate and the guy that Felix now has a slight grudge against for a very petty reason, but Felix can't help it.  _ "Who's your friend?" _

Felix has no idea if Chan is going to introduce himself or if he should just bite the bullet and try speaking proper Korean. He had been practicing with his mom non-stop, trying to make the words sound like actual words and not just vague sounds. He started watching things in Korean and listening to K-Pop for good measure. All leading up to this moment— speaking with someone who has no clue Felix is Australian-Korean and not just Korean.

_ "Hi, there," _ Felix greets.  _ "I'm Felix, Chan's friend from Australia." _ Thinking about each word before saying them is not going to last, but Felix hopes it at least worked in this case.

_ "Nice to meet you, are you coming with us?" _ Changbin asks and Felix looks to Chan, hoping to communicate that he can't speak Korean for an entire night.

_ "Changbin," _ Chan begins, then he speaks too quickly for Felix to really catch what he means. He guesses from context clues and the words he does recognize, that Chan is basically telling Changbin they can't go out together tonight. Changbin nods and waves Chan off. "Okay, Felix, drop your stuff here, and then we can go if you're ready." Felix kinda wants to change clothes, but with Changbin in the dorm, he doesn't feel quite comfortable enough to do that.

"Yeah, we can go," Felix replies, accidentally catching Changbin's eye, who is seemingly trying to figure out what they are saying. That's one advantage to speaking English, Felix supposes, not too many people here will necessarily know what he's saying all the time. But that also means that Felix has a limited amount of people he can talk to comfortably. Double edged sword as they say.

Chan leads Felix out of his dorm and the two walk down the stairs and into the night. Felix sticks his fists in the pockets of his jacket and shivers.

“Too cold for you?” Chan teases. He’s not even wearing his jacket, so Felix glares at him. There’s no way Chan didn’t go through the same adjustment when he first moved here.

“Oh, please,” Felix retorts. “Anyways, where are we going tonight?”

“To this little hole in the wall place three blocks away. Changbin took me there a few weeks ago and their sushi is phenomenal.”

“Ooh, sushi. Fancy.”

“It is not nearly as expensive as it was when we were in Australia, or else I wouldn’t be paying,” Chan replies.

“I’m not letting you pay for me,” Felix counters. “We can split the bill, but that’s my final offer.”

“See you say that, but do you already have Won on hand or have your credit card set up here?” Chan asks.

“You’re too smart for your own good,” Felix whines. “Maybe I just won’t eat.”

“If I feed you sushi, then will you eat it?” Chan asks, looking a bit coy and Felix feels a tinge of heat in his ears.

“Maybe,” Felix replies, trying to also be coy, but failing as Chan just laughs and ruffles his hair.

“Anything for my best friend.” And there it is. The friend zone. Felix is far too acquainted with the friend zone for his liking and wishes to escape it at some point, but for now, all he can do is smile through the pain and laugh along.

“Yeah, bestie.” That hurt to say.

“Anyways, we’re here,” Chan redirects, leading Felix into one of the narrowest restaurants Felix has ever been to. Sure, he’s heard of hole in the walls, but this is arguably smaller than a hole in the wall. But it’s cozy and the food smells really good, so Felix really doesn’t mind. The hostess asks Chan something, but Felix isn’t listening enough to really pick it up. She walks them over to one of three tables in the whole place and sets menus down in front of them. Felix sits with his back to the entrance and tries to look over the menu in front of him.

On the bright side, Felix can read some of the items on the menu, but not all of them and generally not the little descriptions under them. Felix frowns, but doesn’t say anything to Chan. He’s a big kid now and can figure it out if he really tries.

“Do you need me to translate anything for you?” Chan asks and Felix shakes his head. Fuck, what does the word  _ chamchi _ mean again? It’s right on the tip of his tongue, and he just can’t quite remember. It’s definitely some kind of meat, but Felix doesn’t remember which one specially. “Are you sure? You look pretty focused.”

“What’s the word  _ chamchi _ mean?” Felix asks, relenting. He really doesn’t know and staring at it won’t magically define it.

“Oh that’s tuna,” Chan replies. “Anything else I can help you with?” Felix’s mouth twists and Chan stares at him. “It’s really okay if you’re still struggling with the language, I’m already really impressed with your progress, but I know how hard it is to completely switch over really fast. So let me help you.”

“Okay, I can barely read anything on the menu, but that’s embarrassing to say,” Felix admits.

“Just tell me what you normally like and I’ll order it for you,” Chan replies, smiling and it’s so genuine and pure it hurts Felix’s heart. All he ever wants to see is Chan happy. He’s so beautiful inside and out and deserves all the happiness in the world. If Felix could give it to him, he totally would, but sadly that’s just not feasible.

“I’m really flexible; I just don’t like eel or anything crazy spicy.” 

“Same tastes as always.”

“I suppose I haven’t changed really,” Felix says. There’s a double meaning to his words, but he isn’t sure if Chan picks up on it. He’s loved Chan since he was twelve years old, that certainly hasn’t changed or waivered in the past six years or so.

“That’s what makes everything so easy with you,” Chan begins. “You’re the same as the first day I met you and that’s what makes us mesh that well. I feel like I know you inside and out honestly.”

“That means a lot, Chan.” Felix feels so close to confessing right then, but the hostess comes up to them, so Felix bites his tongue for the rest of the night. Chan orders their food and thanks the staff for Felix which is sweet and they play catch up over dinner, Felix finding it all too easy to fall back into old habits.

Dinner goes smoothly and Chan ends up paying, against Felix’s wishes even though he still has no cash. They walk back in the dark, laughing and chatting until they are in Chan’s apartment.

“Shh, we gotta be quiet because Changbin might be asleep,” Chan warns and Felix nods. Chan unlocks his front door and grabs Felix’s hand out of instinct and before Felix can really think too much about it, the two of them are sneaking back to Chan’s room. The door opens with a creak and arguably Chan doesn’t need to keep holding onto Felix’s hand, but he does and that makes Felix feel all kinds of warm.

Chan flicks on a lamp and turns back to Felix. They gaze at each other for a moment and Felix can really appreciate how much Chan has grown up over time. He’s come a long way from the three year old boy Felix once knew. 

“I’m going to pull out some pajamas, and your suitcase is right where you left it,” Chan says and Felix nods before remembering he left it in the hallway.

“Wait, my bag is in the hallway.”

“Do you want to just wear some of my pj’s then?” Chan offers and Felix nods. Chan walks over to his closet and grabs two pairs of pants and shirts, tossing one to Felix. Felix isn’t sure if he should just change in here— and Chan is half naked. Amazing. Felix tears his eyes away from Chan’s form and pulls his shirt off. He slips the new one on before taking his pants off. Once Felix is dressed, he looks over at Chan who’s already dressed and who’s eyes are focused on Felix’s hip. Felix’s cheeks heat up, but he chooses not to think about it too much. 

“Preference about which side you sleep on?” Felix asks, snapping Chan’s eyes back to his and Chan shakes his head. Felix climbs in on the left side and curls so his back will face Chan. He honestly doesn’t know if his brain could handle sleeping face to face with Chan. Felix feels the bed dip under Chan’s weight and Chan adjusts himself, so he’s next to Felix, but not touching him. This doesn’t feel quite right.

Felix lays there for a few minutes, but suddenly he’s much less sleepy than he was before. He flips around so he’s facing Chan and finds Chan awake too.

“Why aren’t you asleep?” Felix whispers.

“I’m not comfortable,” Chan admits and Felix immediately assumes he’s the reason Chan can’t sleep.

“Do you want me to go sleep on the couch?” Chan shakes his head.

“No, can we like— cuddle though?” Chan asks. That’s not what Felix was expecting at all.

“Yeah, that’s okay.” Felix moves closer to Chan and puts his head on Chan’s chest. Chan’s arms wrap around him and Felix’s legs intertwine with Chan’s. This is a much more intimate position than either of them have been in with each other, but Felix doesn’t mind— in fact, he’s really happy to be held in Chan’s arms where he can feel Chan’s love. Whether that love is only platonic or romantic still remains to be seen.

* * *

“Do you really think us bleaching our hair is a good idea?” Felix asks. “Like neither of us are hairdressers and bleach is scary.”

“That’s why you are going dark red. You only need to leave the bleach on for a little bit to get it light enough for the dye to take,” Chan explains. “If your hair falls out, I’ll buy you the nicest wig on the market. Deal?”

“You better not make my hair fall out,” Felix mutters. “But deal.” Felix puts on the plastic gloves that came with the set and has Chan sit on the edge of the bathtub. Since Chan’s has to go for a lot longer, Felix is supposed to do his first, and then Chan will do his. This is honestly the worst plan that Chan has ever had. Curse Felix for showing Chan a video of Seventeen. Now Chan wants to look like Jeonghan in Don’t Wanna Cry. Which is very valid, Jeonghan is gorgeous, but Felix isn’t a professional stylist, so Chan will probably not turn out that sexy.

Felix picked a must safer idol to emulate; Jihoon in Clap, so there’s a bit less risk. Chan might be okay with risking his hair falling out, but Felix is very not okay with that.

But Felix will do his very best so Chan’s hair doesn’t get to that part. Felix takes the bottle of bleach in hand, already mixed by Chan in his eagerness, and uses the tip to make a part in Chan’s hair. He squirts the bleach on along the part and rubs it along the roots of Chan’s hair.

And repeat. Over and over until all the roots of Chan’s head are covered. Felix takes what’s left over the rest of Chan’s hair, rubs it in again just to make sure it’s really covering everything.

“Okay, I think I’m done,” Felix says. He glances at the clock. “You have twenty more minutes with that on your hair, can you do mine in that amount of time?”

“I don’t see why not. I’m more of a professional than you,” Chan replies. Felix takes Chan’s spot on the edge of the bathtub and looks at him skeptically.

“When did you become a professional? Isn’t this the first time either of us have bleached or dyed our hair?” Felix asks.

“Changbin’s boyfriend, Seungmin, is addicted to dying his hair and one time Changbin was too busy with exams to help Seungmin, so I got dragged over there to help,” Chan explains. “It really wasn’t that bad.”

“That’s exciting I suppose. But if you don’t mind my asking, why call them boyfriends rather than soulmates? I almost never hear people using that these days,” Felix replies.

“They aren’t soulmates,” Chan clarifies and Felix’s mouth makes a little O. Chan clearly catches it in the mirror and laughs. “Yeah, I was surprised as well, but they communicate well and have their own set of rules and shit, so I don’t really worry about them.”

“I’m proud of them then because that seems like it would be really difficult to pull off,” Felix comments.

“Well, if they don’t think they’ve met their soulmate or know something bad happened to them then it makes sense. Like if for example, Seungmin’s soulmate died, that wouldn’t mean he gets another, but it also wouldn’t mean he deserves to die alone,” Chan points out and Felix hums as Chan covers his head in bleach.

“That makes sense,” Felix says. “Anyway, is there anything else exciting happening with you.”

“It’s still the beginning half of the year, so it’s not like anyone’s had any crazy scandals yet. Have you made any other friends yet?” Chan asks causing Felix to tense a bit. He really hasn’t even tried to put himself out there. He goes to class, goes back to his dorm, studies, and then bothers Chan four to six days a week. And repeat.

“No…” Felix looks in the mirror and sees a small frown on Chan’s face. He seems to think that Felix needs more friends than just him which doesn’t really make sense to Felix. For years it was just them two until he moved away. That’s when Felix met Hyunjin and Jisung, but that’s the end of the list of Felix’s friends. And considering two of them live on another continent, Felix doesn’t think those count in this case.

“Do you want me to introduce you to some more people? You and Seungmin would probably get along great and you’ve met Changbin already,” Chan rambles.

“You really don’t have to,” Felix replies.

“It’s okay, I want—” Chan is cut off by his timer going off which means he has to rinse his hair. “Okay I have a tiny bit more of yours then I’m going to hop in the shower.” Felix gives a thumbs up and Chan quickly covers the rest of his head.

“I have twenty minutes, so take your time,” Felix says.

“Wait— I have to shower naked.” Felix can’t help but giggle as he stands up.

“Is this news to you?” Felix asks. Both of them look ridiculous with bleach all over their hair.

“How do I get my shirt off without getting bleach all over it?” Chan asks.

“Okay, that’s a good point, let me help you.” Felix pulls Chan’s shirt up and he pulls both of his arms out. Don’t look down, don’t look down, don’t look down. “Let me pull the rest of it off.” Felix bunches up the shirt and pulls the front up to Chan’s browline, then stretches it as far away from Chan’s head as he can and pulls it off. Glancing at the collar, Felix doesn’t see any bleach. Without thinking about it, Felix looks to Chan and sees him shirtless. Wow, Chan is so much buffer than he remembers.

“Are you trying to help with my pants too?” Chan teases and Felix spins around and walks out of the bathroom, cheeks aflame while Chan laughs.

* * *

“Yo, Chan,” Felix calls, opening the door to Chan’s dorm. Changbin surprisingly isn’t on the couch like normal and the lights are all off. That’s weird though. Chan must be home though because the door was unlocked. He never minds Felix dropping by at weird times so why would this be any different?

Felix tiptoes down to Chan’s room and he doesn’t even need to push open the door to figure out what’s going on. Backing away slowly, Felix holds his breath. Who knew Chan had a girlfriend? Opening the door makes a squeak and Felix cringes. Chan is clearly busy with his other activities so Felix doesn’t worry too much about him hearing anything.

Felix walks back out of Chan’s dorm and tries not to have a breakdown. Like Felix thinks he’s going to combust, which is very bad because panic attacks aren’t fun. But why is Felix even freaking out? He never got any form of confirmation that Chan was his soulmate.

He’s not even thinking about where he’s going. All Felix knows is that he wants to get away from here. Anywhere is better, but Felix doesn’t really want to go back to his dorm either.

Felix wanders around for a few blocks and stumbles upon a park which seems like a good enough place to stop as any. He sits down on a park bench and rests his elbows on his knees. It’s not like people don’t hook up with people that aren’t their soulmates, but it’s not common. Though college would be the place to do hook ups if anywhere. People who haven’t found their soulmate that crave physical intimacy.

Oh god, what if that girl is Chan’s soulmate? Where does that put Felix now? Every thought Felix is having just makes his stomach twist.

There’s a hand on his shoulder and Felix sits up immediately, blinking to try and clear his vision. Another student, Felix assumes, sits down next to him looking concerned.

“Are you okay?” they ask.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Felix replies, trying to fake a smile so as not to drag this stranger into his own drama.

“No offense, but you don’t look okay. I’m Minho by the well.” Minho’s words are hard to follow but Felix nods along. “Do you speak English?”

“How did you know?” Felix asks.

“Your language is a bit off and while I’m a dance major, I minor in English, so while not perfect by a long shot— I can speak with you,” Minho explains.

“That’s actually really helpful. I’m stressed out and I’m nowhere near fluent in Korean yet, so I don’t know if I could’ve gotten much farther in our conversation,” Felix says. “So anyways, there’s this guy.”

“There always is,” Minho replies and Felix looks down at his knees and laughs watery, but still there.

“Yeah, I suppose you’re right. But this guy— I think he’s my soulmate. I’ve thought that since I was twelve years old that he was my soulmate and I came to college here because of him,” Felix explains.

“So where’s the issue?” Minho asks.

“He treats me like a straight guy treats a gay one. I’ve never even come out to him, but jeez, I’ll say something sweet and he’ll go, ‘thanks, bro.’” Minho laughs and Felix laughs along. This whole thing is such a mess but the laughing is lessening the pressure in his chest.

“I can see the issue now. What happened now that caused you to come to the park?”

“I went to his apartment and…” Felix trails off. This is so embarrassing to explain to a stranger.

“And?”

“And he was there. With a woman. Doing things together.”

“Oh, well that is not great,” Minho says. “Not my cup of tea at all, but I can understand how you feel.”

“You’re asexual?” Felix knows asexual people exist, most people do, but in a world of soulmates, they are rare.

“The word in Korean is seonggii eobsneun and I have no clue if those are the same thing, but I think they are,” Minho replies.

“So you don’t have a soulmate?” Felix asks, words coming out of his mouth before really thinking about them. “I’m sorry if that's weird, it just came out.”

“Don’t worry, it’s something people ask a lot, and even though it’s not my job to explain things to others, I’m often times the only asexual person people know. But yeah, I don’t know if I have a soulmate. I don’t experience any attraction ever, not even potential attraction,” Minho explains.

“Then aroace might be a better term,” Felix suggests. “Whatever makes you feel comfortable.”

“If that’s the more accurate term, then that works,” Minho replies. “But in the end, I know what I like and the official labels of it all don’t really matter to me.”

“That’s so mature for your age,” Felix says. “I have only ever felt potential attraction to Chan, so I suppose I’m gay.”

“And that’s totally valid. Any other major things we should talk about before I go back to my dorm to study?” Minho asks. “No offense, really. I just know my calculus teacher has a test next week because he’s evil and it’s been two weeks since our last one.”

“Can I get your number first? You’re the first person I’ve really tried befriending since I got here.”

“I’m happy that I get to be your first one then.” Minho smiles and the fear in Felix’s mind disappears.

* * *

“So you’re still not on great terms with Chan I take it?” Minho asks, applying the first bit of bleach. They’re in Minho’s apartment this time and Felix had practically begged Minho to touch up his hair. “It’s been like three weeks.”

“Maybe so, but that is the most awkward situation I’ve ever been in,” Felix defends.

“Does Chan even know that you’re avoiding him?” Minho asks. “Because if he never knew about you coming over wouldn’t that mean he just thinks you’re ignoring him for no reason?”

“You raise a good point, but he’s only asked me to do things three times and one of those times, I actually was busy.”

“And another you felt weird and guilty so we got ice cream together,” Minho points out.

“Okay, maybe you’re right,” Felix contends. “I’ll call him.”

“Call him right now or I’m not finishing your hair,” Minho threatens. “I know if I leave this to you that you won’t do it.” Felix pouts, but pulls out his phone and dials Chan’s number, putting it on speaker phone.

“What if he doesn’t answer?” Felix whispers.

“Felix?” Chan says and Felix nearly jumps.

“Oh, hi there, Chan,” Felix replies. “I was just calling to see if you’re free to hang out sometime soon. I’m basically free all this week.”

“That’s great news, Changbin and Seungmin wanted to go to some bar with me, but I didn’t want to third wheel them. Would you want to come?” Chan asks. Felix wants to scream, this falls under the category of ‘is this a date or is Felix reading too far into things?’

“Yeah, that sounds like fun. Text me the details, I’ll mark my calendar,” Felix replies.

“Okay, catch you later, Lixie.”

“Bye, Chan.” Felix hangs up.

“Lixie, huh? And basically asking you to double date,” Minho says. “I see what you mean now, he either really likes you or he’s the most oblivious straight boy to ever walk the earth.”

“I’m afraid that it’s the second one,” Felix mumbles.

“Well, I’m done with your hair now, so I will leave you to your shower thoughts.” Minho takes off his gloves and leaves the bathroom with a wave.

Felix stares into the mirror, hoping the answers to all his problems will magically come to him, but nothing does and he has to rinse his hair or else it’ll fall out.

* * *

Felix didn’t realize how fast time could pass until the day of Chan’s graduation came. Minho knew how much Chan means to Felix, and even though he urged Felix to confess to Chan probably half a dozen times.

The memory of when Felix went out with Chan, Changbin, and Seungmin for the first time sticks out the most. Minho had told Felix they were basically going on a double date and with the way Seungmin and Changbin shot them looks, it certainly seemed like it. And Felix had actually been really close to doing something, but then a pretty girl whisked Chan away and he didn’t see him for the rest of the night(Minho doesn’t know that part). Changbin and Seungmin took Felix home and it was the most painful car ride Felix has ever been on because his Korean still wasn’t that great and he had been a little tipsy, so he couldn’t even make small talk with them really.

Minho and Felix take spots at the back of the auditorium, leaning against the back wall and talking softly throughout the ceremony. Next year it would be Minho up there and the year after, it would be Felix. The concept of graduating is so scary to Felix.

“This whole thing is so stressful,” Felix mumbles.

“Why? Like I know the obvious reasons because the entire concept of graduating is scary, but I feel like there are probably other ones,” Minho replies.

“Chan’s parents are here from Australia to support him and they’ve known me since I was three, but I also don’t really want to talk to them,” Felix admits. “And my mom almost came and I had to convince her she shouldn’t because it’s too expensive.”

“Your mom was going to come to your friend’s graduation?” Minho sounds surprised and Felix doesn’t blame him. On a surface level, it does seem strange.

“I don’t think you understand just how attached at the hip me and Chan were as kids,” Felix says. “Like we were confused for each other and replied to each other's names. We were the same person.”

“That’s crazy.”

“It was. Especially because we’ve been so distant compared to that since he moved away. Did you know that I have had three friends who aren’t Chan ever?” Felix asks.

“If I’m one of them then who are the other two? Because I don’t think they’re Changbin and Seungmin,” Minho says. Felix’s eyes latch onto Seungmin and Changbin in the crowd. It’s not like he doesn’t like them, in fact they get along pretty well, but they’ve always felt like Chan’s friends rather than mutual friends.

“Hyunjin and Jisung. I don’t talk to them as much as I should, but they’re both busy with school back home and our breaks never align, so it’s more just sporadic long texts and emails,” Felix explains. “I miss them to bits, but I also know they’re okay with just them.”

“Soulmates, I assume.”

“Right as you are.” Felix’s eyes watch the stage as Chan’s name is called. He gets his diploma and everyone claps for him. Chan’s dimples are so prominent that Felix can see them from here and he can’t help but cheer for him as loud as he can. Minho cheers along and Felix will swear that Chan looked right at him.

Once the ceremony is over, Felix dawdles, not wanting to talk to any of the family. Minho nudges Felix a bit and he glares at him, but walks over to Chan, his parents, Changbin and Seungmin.

“Lixie,” Chan cheers, practically jumping on Felix. Felix wraps his arms around Chan and smiles. Chan hugs are amazing. “I saw you in the crowd, I’m so happy you came.”

“I wouldn’t miss this for the world,” Felix replies. He really wouldn’t, even as awkward as it is. Reluctantly, Felix pulls away from Chan and says hello to everyone else. Chan’s parents give Felix a huge hug too.

They all end up going out to eat together, and while Minho sticks close to Felix, he also socializes with Seungmin quite a bit.

“Felix, can I speak to you outside for a moment?” Chan asks. Felix nods, and follows Chan outside, slightly nervous.

“What is it?” Felix asks. Chan takes Felix’s hands in his.

“I’ve been thinking about this for a while, and it’s just been nerve wracking to tell you,” Chan admits, not quite making eye contact with Felix. Could this be what Felix has always wanted to hear from Chan? A love confession because what else could it be— “I’m moving back to Australia.”

“Oh.” Felix has no words. It wasn’t what Felix was hoping, but this is something else entirely. 

“I know this probably wasn’t what you were expecting, but I’m tired of Korea and seeing my family again really made me realize how much I missed them,” Chan explains.

“Yeah, I totally get that, I’m just— wow. Surprised.” Felix gives a pained smile and Chan looks at him looking concerned.

“I know it must suck for you that I’m moving, but you won’t even know I’m gone. We can video call again and everything,” Chan reassures, but Felix stopped listening. Chan lets go of Felix’s hands and envelops him in another hug, but Felix can’t even appreciate it, he’s so hurt over Chan leaving again. It’s like having his heart ripped out for a second time.

“I’ll be okay,” Felix manages, even though he’s not sure of that either.

* * *

Minho’s graduation is a much less painful affair. Felix had already prepped himself to hear the news that Minho would be moving.

“Let’s go out for ice cream,” Minho says, once the ceremony is over. He’s still in his robes and Felix looks over him.

“Don’t you want to change first?” Felix asks. Minho pulls off his cap and gown and reveals normal street clothes and sticks them in a fanny pack.

“Wow.”

“To the ice cream store because I want to talk to you about something.” Oh no, not this again. Felix doesn’t know if he can handle Minho moving away as well. But he won’t hold Minho back from achieving his goals. The two of them walk from the auditorium to the ice cream parlor in relative quiet; Felix is too scared to ask any questions and Minho doesn’t seem to really want to talk.

After the two of them order and get their ice cream (mint chocolate chip for Felix and pistachio for Minho), they sit down and Felix waits for Minho to break the bad news.

“I feel like you’re extra stressed out,” Minho comments. “I really don’t have anything bad to say.”

“You aren’t moving away?” Felix asks, in between bites.

“Oh, not in the slightest. I actually just wanted to ask if you wanted to move in with me for your senior year. I plan on living off campus for at least a year because I want to be here for your graduation. And living with a roommate is cheaper anyway,” Minho explains.

“I would absolutely love to,” Felix exclaims. “I really thought you were gonna leave forever or something awful. I’m so glad I was wrong.”

“You’re my best friend, Felix and I’m not going to leave you to graduate on your own,” Minho says and Felix smiles.

* * *

Felix’s graduation isn’t the grand affair he had hoped it to be. His mom couldn’t afford to fly out here, Chan didn’t have the time, Hyunjin and Jisung were busy with their own graduation, but Minho took the time to come and that really means a lot.

Felix takes the diploma and hears Minho cheering for him as he walks across the stage. The last semester has been the worst of Felix’s life. He’s been so depressed and struggling to complete his classwork. But Minho has been so supportive and helpful and that’s all Felix thinks about as he crosses the stage.

Minho and Felix had decided two months ago that it would probably be best for Felix if he went back home to Australia. And that’s the plan. They’ll spend most of the summer together and then go on with their separate lives. It’s bittersweet, but they decided to stay friends, but acknowledged they won’t talk every single day.

When Minho wraps his arms around Felix, congratulating him, and all Felix can think is how grateful he is that he and Minho became friends and how he won’t ever forget him even if they grow apart.

* * *

Felix stands with his suitcases in front of his new home. He’s moved back to Australia, Bryon to be specific. Minho helped him pick out a cute duplex. Apparently, he’s going to have a roommate, but it shouldn’t be a huge deal. The two parts are separate enough that there wasn’t a need to introduce them, but the roommate has the key in so Felix isn’t gonna need to introduce himself.

Felix walks up to the front door and knocks, bracing himself for the fear of meeting a new person for the first time. The door opens and Felix’s jaw drops.

“Felix?”

“Chan? What are you doing here?” Felix asks.

“I live here?” Chan says, but it’s phrased like a question. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m the new roommate,” Felix replies. “I had no idea you would be living here.”

“Well, uhh, come on in.” Chan opens the door and Felix walks in, feeling surprisingly uncomfortable. Him and Chan hadn’t formally spoken to each other in over a year at this point, so this is an awkward reunion to say the least.

And things stay awkward for a few weeks after that. Felix eventually brings up the courage to talk to Chan because he feels like he’s walking on pins and needles. They used to be so close, but somehow they feel an ocean away still.

“Chan, can I talk to you?” Felix asks, nervously. 

“Yeah, what is it?” Chan sits up from his desk and Felix swallows, leaning against the doorway of Chan’s bedroom.

“Why are you so weird around me?”

“What do you mean?”

“The entire time I’ve been living here with you, you treat me like we haven’t known each other for nearly twenty years and it’s fucking weird. It feels like you don’t want me around and if for some reason you don’t, grow a pair and say that straight up,” Felix rants. His chest already feels a bit lighter, but it’s not enough.

“I…” Chan trails off and Felix crosses his arms, waiting for an answer. “I don’t want you to rely so heavily on me. You’ve followed me halfway around the globe for our whole lives. There’s so much more out there.” Felix’s eye twitches.

“Why do you think I did that?” Felix asks, voice cold. Chan is the most oblivious idiot on the face of the Earth if he doesn’t have some semblance of what’s going on here.

“I’m not sure, but I’m not the only thing ever, you know. There’s so much more to do and explore— in college you did that with Minho and that was really good for you,” Chan explains.

“Alright, shut up.” Chan closes his mouth and looks at Felix, a tinge embarrassed. “I followed you around for years, fawning for your attention because I think we’re soulmates. I’ve thought that since we were twelve.” Chan’s jaw drops.

“But that’s not possible—”

“Yes, it is,” Felix counters. “You don’t know how I feel.”

“But I know how I feel—” Felix is at his breaking point. Chan’s just denying everything and not listening to him at all.

“Oh my god, Chan!” Felix shouts. “Would you actually listen to what I’m saying for five fucking minutes? I’m aware that I don’t know anything for sure, but I’m just trying to explain myself.” Chan needs to pull his head out of his ass for a few minutes to let Felix properly confess.

“Felix, I really don’t think—”

“But how do you know, Chan?” Felix counters, slight mocking Chan with his tone of voice. “We’ve never kissed so you can’t say for sure.” Felix hesitates before tacking on, “Believe me, I would remember if we did.”

“I don’t even have potential attraction towards men. How could I be your soulmate?” Chan tries, but he doesn’t even seem to believe himself. If Felix is going to keep Chan in his life for the foreseeable future, he has to know one way or the other.

“I’m not trying to argue your sexuality. Buy, fuck, can you place yourself in my shoes for a moment. I’m in love with you. And I haven’t known for  _ years _ if we were just friends or skirting on the edge of something else.” Felix’s eyes burn with unshed tears and he wipes his eyes on his sleeve. “I don’t know what love feels like Chan. Sure, I’ve loved my friends and family but it never felt quite the same as it did and still does with you.”

“I’m really sorry, Lixie. I’m sorry I’m not what you think I am because I can assure you—”

“Save it,” Felix snips. “You’re just saying the same bullshit over and over. I’m sick of hearing it. Felix turns to walk away, but hesitates. “It really sucks that you’re so insecure, you can’t even kiss me once to lay this to rest. It’s not a big deal if I’m wrong, I can handle that, but I can’t handle never knowing for the rest of eternity.”

For a moment, Felix feels satisfied at the low blow he laid on Chan, but the feeling doesn’t last, morphing into guilt instead. Felix leaves Chan’s bedroom without another word and heads back outside to climb the stairs up to his half of the duplex.

He sighs and opens his door, locking it, and flopping on his bed. Felix feels so utterly awful about the whole thing, but there’s nothing to do at this point, but try to sleep off some of the pain in his heart.

The next morning, Felix wakes up to a knock at his door. Felix ignores it and rolls over onto his stomach, but the knocking doesn’t go away. Grumbling, Felix sits up.

“Go away!” Felix calls. If it’s the mailman trying to make Felix sign for ramen, he’ll regret that, but something tells him that it isn’t that at all.

“It’s Chan.”

“I wish you were the mailman because at least then I would have comfort ramen,” Felix yells back. He’s not nearly as angry as he was last night, a night of sleep having cooled him off quite a bit, but he still doesn’t want to see Chan.

“Okay, it’s the mailman.” On a normal day, Felix would laugh and play along, but today he’s really not up to any of this.

“But I know it’s you so go away.” Felix grabs his phone and checks the time. It’s already past two, meaning half the day is already gone.

“I’ll use the spare key,” Chan threatens. Felix likes to have his own space and Chan is aware of that, yet here he is, violating that for  _ some _ reason. Felix is annoyed though, so he gets up and whips open the front door before Chan can open it.

“What do you want?”

“I thought a lot about what you said—” Chan doesn’t quite meet Felix’s eyes and Felix is tempted to grab Chan’s chin and force him to look him in the eyes. “And you’re right.”

“What changed?” Felix doesn’t let Chan in, but he opens the door a bit more. He really doesn’t want to stay mad at Chan, but he really can’t drop something like this. “Why didn’t you say something last night?” Chan takes a deep breath.

“I’m afraid. Like really really afraid,” Chan confesses.

“Of what?” Felix asks.

“Of you being right.” Felix debates between slamming the doors in Chan’s face or dragging him in. Thankfully for Chan, Felix chooses the latter, closing the door behind them.

“Alright, sit on the bed and explain yourself,” Felix orders and Chan does as asked. Felix stands over Chan and clasps his hands together.

“When I said I never had potential attraction towards a man, I was lying. I feel it towards you, but I really didn’t want us to be soulmates because you deserve someone so much more than me,” Chan says and Felix’s anger melts away. That certainly changes things. “I’m scared that I won’t be the perfect soulmate to you because you’re my best friend in the entire world. All I could ever want for you is infinite happiness.”

“Oh, Chan, why didn’t you say so?” Felix can’t help but cup Chan’s cheeks, thumbs running over the soft skin. “I love you just as you are and I could never want for you to be anything different.”

“I love you too,” Chan replies, looking shy. “Will you kiss me then?”

“Of course,” Felix replies, gently placing himself into Chan’s lap. Felix moves his hands to hold Chan’s hair and his shoulder.

Felix presses his lips to Chan’s. They stay like that for a moment, then Chan starts to kiss back. Felix’s chest feels full, like all that was ever wrong could never be wrong again. Chan breaks the kiss.

“Can we get more comfortable?” Chan asks.

“Yes, of course.” Felix climbs off Chan’s lap and Chan lays flat on Felix’s bed, and Chan tugs Felix onto his lap causing Felix to whine. “Chan!”

“Yes?” Chan looks cheeky and Felix plants a quick kiss on Chan's lips.

“You’re something else,” Felix mumbles, bracing his elbows on both sides of Chan’s head. Chan angles his chin up and captures Felix’s lips in a kiss. Felix gets a little brave and pokes his tongue into Chan’s mouth, who surprisingly lets Felix in with eagerness.

Felix hasn’t kissed anyone before, and he can’t help enjoy the feeling of learning everything there is to know about Chan’s kissing style. Apparently, everyone kisses differently, but there’s something practically magical about Chan’s style. Chan’s hands latch onto Felix’s hips and pulls him closer.

“You feel it right?” Felix asks. He has to make sure that this all isn’t just in his head.

“I most certainly do,” Chan replies, putting his mouth onto Felix’s neck and rutting up his hips.

“I told you so,” Felix mumbles, biting back a moan. Chan sucks on a particularly sensitive part of Felix’s neck causing Felix to wriggle in Chan’s hold and whine. Chan pulls away and Felix is quick to kiss Chan like there’s no tomorrow.

“Take your shirt off,” Chan says in between kisses and Felix breaks them apart fully to pull his tee shirt off. Normally, he would be a bit more self conscious about something like this but Chan looks at Felix with such lust and admiration that Felix doesn’t care.

Chan’s hands come up and run over Felix’s chest, pinching one of his nipples causing Felix to whine.

“Chan,” Felix moans. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Chan replies before tugging Felix down for another kiss. Felix kisses back, hands on Chan’s chest and Chan gasps when Felix pinches Chan’s nipple. “That was sneaky.”

“And?” One of Chan’s hands drops down to grab Felix’s ass and he whimpers. “You’re evil.” Chan gives a cheeky smile and Felix kisses Chan again. And again. And again until they lose track of time and get fully lost within each other.

* * *

“I can’t believe this is our first date,” Felix mumbles, standing on Parkway Drive, hand in hand with Chan.

“It’s also iconic,” Chan defends. “Who wouldn’t want to steal a street sign?”

“I think lots of people don’t want street signs. Especially those that are on really high poles,” Felix points out. Felix didn’t have a lot of knowledge on the metalcore scene in Bryon, but somehow Chan did and brought Felix out to a concert for their first date, which had been a lot of fun Felix admits. But now they are stealing a street sign just for funsies or something.

“Those people aren’t me,” Chan replies, letting go of Felix’s hand to pull out a screw driver from his pocket. “Now are you gonna help me or what?”

“You’re ridiculous,” Felix mutters.

“Oh, but first, we must take a selfie,” Chan says. “It’s the thing to do here.”

“Australia is weird.”

“Felix you’re Australian.”

“I’m aware, now take out your phone,” Felix says. “Or else I’ll take the picture.” Chan slugs an arm around Felix and pulls him close.

“I dare you to take better selfies than me,” Chan whispers in Felix’s ear and Felix giggles.

“Okay, smile.” Felix whips out his phone and opens the camera. Chan pops a peace sign and Felix smiles, making sure to get the Parkway Drive sign in the background. Felix takes a few with the last one catching Chan kissing Felix on the cheek. “You’re so cheeky.”

“I love you,” Chan sing songs. “Now boost me up so I can unscrew this sign.” Felix sighs and looks up at the sign. It’s at least ten feet off the ground, with a fence right next to it, but the fence is to hold back bushes and only around waist height.

“Climb onto the fence and hold the pole instead,” Felix directs. “It’ll be easier that way.” Chan does as asked and Felix stays next to him in case Chan slips. When Chan stretches on his tip toes, he can reach the sign. The first two screws come out easily, but the last one is really stuck.

“Felix, I can’t get it,” Chan says.

“Uh oh, what should I do?” Felix asks. “Do you want me to try and get it down?”

“Let me try one more time.” Chan sticks the screwdriver in the screw and twists it as hard as he can. The screw pops loose and the sign clatters to the ground and Chan is sent backwards into the dense bushes. 

“Chan!” Felix exclaims. “Are you okay?”

“Peachy,” Chan groans. “That was scary and now I need a hand up, but nothing is broken.”

“Good because I can’t drive,” Felix replies, peering over the fence.

“I thought you got your license six years ago.”

“I did for a bit, but that was in Korea and I never got my license here, so if we fly over there, then I can drive,” Felix explains, holding out his arm to Chan who latches on.

One good pull and Chan is up enough to climb onto the fence and jump off. He brushes the remnants of bush off himself and smiles at Felix before picking up the street sign.

“This is so cool,” Chan says. “But I’m worried someone is going to come out here soon.”

“You raise a good point, let’s get back in the car,” Felix agrees. They walk back to the car and Chan puts the sign in the backseat before climbing in the front seat with Felix in the passenger one. The car is cold and Felix rubs his hands together while he waits for Chan to turn on the car. The engine revs and the console lights flicker on.

“Did you like our first date, Lixie?” Chan asks, looking over at Felix. Felix nods eagerly.

“I loved it.”

“What do you think about wrapping tonight up with a kiss?” Felix raises a brow and leans across the center console to Chan, cupping his cheek, bringing their noses together.

“I think I would like that very much,” Felix whispers against Chan’s lips. Chan closes the gap and brings his hand to the back of Felix’s neck. Felix pokes his tongue into Chan’s mouth, tasting every inch of him, loving every second. Felix moves his hand to Chan’s shoulder, but in the process, his elbow lands on the horn of the car. The sound shoots the two of them apart. For a moment they stare at each other and then they’re laughing.

“I can’t believe you set off the horn,” Chan says. “But that might be a sign to wrap up this date.”

“Or take things back home,” Felix suggests. “I’m just saying I could totally go for a movie.”

“Oh, I thought you meant…”

“That as well.” Chan’s cheeks are a pretty pink and Felix laughs. “Let's go home.” As Chan drives down Parkway Drive, Felix watches him. Twenty something odd years later, Felix can finally call the love of his life his.

**Author's Note:**

> check out the accompanying fanart of chan and felix's selfie at parkway drive [here](https://drive.google.com/file/d/11JH3HiQGSX91v2cNaRsIsFk4NeH5A4UZ/view)


End file.
